Racism in the Airport

I was recently traveling with my husband to a conference. Since we fly Southwest he has a habit of leaving me, the rule follower, at boarding time to see if he can board earlier than his boarding pass allows.  (It is like a game to him… insert my eye roll here.)  

Here I was, leaving California, joining the herd toward the boarding line. I made one of those little connections with the kind woman, close to my age, who was next to me. We both became fixated on the gymnastic competition displayed on the wall TV. Just then, an older white woman came up to us asking what numbers we were in the cue.  She was close to our numbers, so she stepped in. Noticing our gaze to the screen, she said with genuine interest and excitement, “Have you seen how well Simone has been doing?!” 

My line-neighbor and I both nodded, and I responded with “Yeah! Even after being admitted into the hospital the night before, and she is still nails.” 

The older woman chirped back. “She is amazing, she has even done a beam routine with a broken foot! And its no wonder… she’s got that athletic gene you know?! That helps.”

I paused and probably looked a bit confused because I was trying to figure out if she was going to give me an update on the specific DNA of Simone Biles, or if she was telling me that all black people were athletic. She did not leave me in suspense. 

“It’s true you know?! They have that athletic gene!” 

The moment stood still- thoughts race through my head- pounding profanities, complex questions, cynical sarcasm, and a barrage of responses. “How often do people of color have to hear garbage like this daily? It is exhausting to help white people see, and I’m white! I need to tell her, but I just met her. She might listen to me since I am white too, but she still probably won’t admit what she said was racist. How do I respond?”

Sadly, my tongue froze, in the blizzard of my thoughts as she turned to other matters of the flight and I turned to the woman next to me and said, “uh, well I’m wondering how that gymnast can flip and twist on the beam and keep her glasses on.” My line neighbor and I talked briefly about the current gymnast on the screen and then went on with the boarding process. 

When I met up with Jeff, I told him about the exchange and he gave me the laundry list of what he would have said in that moment.  I spent about half of that flight kicking myself for not saying anything and thinking of what I could have said that would have been both truth and love. 

I don’t know if anything I would have said in that moment would have been filled with much love, but I keep getting the feeling that sitting in stunned silence only makes it all worse.  Letting people continue in ignorance feeds the problem, and harshly calling it out builds defenses.

I have been wrestling internally about my place in this polarized society for years.  Not just in issues of race equity, but as a woman, a Christian, a mother, and a college coach, what is my place? Where is my voice? 

The scriptures that have been saturating my mind are: “Let your words be filled with grace seasoned with salt” (Colossians 4:6), “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free…” (Galatians 3:28), and “Love one another as I have loved you” (John 13:34). My aim in all of this has been to find a way to speak truth with love in a time when neither are culturally publicized.  As a coach and mom, I am very aware that love is not always tender, but it does always seek the other’s good. When done well, love is NOT self seeking, it is not proud, it keeps no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13). So, my challenge is to see which areas of injustice I can most effectively combat with love. Every person has a voice in one way or another, you have a voice and a platform. I do too, and I want to use the one life God gave me well.  I want to display Jesus, learn continually, and educate others on a process towards Christ. Because I firmly believe that the closer we get to Jesus himself, the more we see our personal desperation for His help. 

Although a crowded airport line might not be the best space for a thoughtful conversation on race, I decided on the plane if I saw her again, I would approach her and address the issue. I did not see that woman after the flight, but within the next 24 hours I had at three opportunities to open my mouth against racism in America and this time I walked in with truth and love. 

I am resolute in becoming less ignorant each day. I have been on my journey to understanding privilege, culture, and bias for some time now, and I still have so much to learn and apply. This is just my next step. I may not always get it right, in fact, I can promise I will not always get it right. It may take some time for me to understand some things, but believe me, I am working to understand. 

I am determined to break my stunned silence, I cannot excuse false beliefs about race, ethnicity, gender, or identity. I feel pushed to engage with people in conversations around the polarizing topics of the day through the power of the Holy Spirit.  However, I am not calling all people to open their mouths at this time.  Before you speak make sure to do the following, and continue to do the following as you engage.  

1)   Educate yourself with material from multiple and diverse sources. 

a.    Listen to at least 10 personal stories of people from a different heritage than yourself before you join the conversation. Stories tell us so much more than history books… and I have some opinions for later about “History Books.”

2)   Have friends that don’t look like you. 

a.    Not just your social currency friend that you introduce or define by their ethnicity! Like real deep friendships, where you can talk about the best and worst of life and hear their open bloody heart on issues. 

3)   Willingly admit what you do not know and ask with curiosity not judgment

a.    Say things like, “This may be ignorant of me, but I am genuinely trying to learn...” Before asking a question. Or upon hearing a not-so expected response you can say something like, “I’m sorry, that was ignorant of me, please educate me” (but in sincerity not sarcasm) 

God is stirring in me, racism is so real, it is not new, and it needs to be addressed.  Although my skin tone allows me the option to ignore the issue, I cannot.  I am a student, stepping into yet another thing the Lord is and has been awakening inside of me, I am willing, I am ready, and I know there is a long road ahead- so help a sister out! Drop me a comment with good reads, thoughts, experiences, wisdom!