Dreams Deferred

“Dreams Deferred” By Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?

    Does it dry up

    like a raisin in the sun?

    Or fester like a sore—

    And then run?

    Does it stink like rotten meat?

    Or crust and sugar over—

    like a syrupy sweet?

    Maybe it just sags

    like a heavy load.

    Or does it explode?

Is there a difference between a dream deferred and a promise or call of God deferred? How would Abraham have felt in the DECADES he waited for his promised son? Did his dream hope up like a raisin? When Israel was in the wilderness for 40 years, did their dream fester like sore? When Mary was raising Jesus in poverty, or watching him die on a cross, did her dream start to stink like rotten meat then explode? Where does our hope go when dreams are deferred? What happens to the dream itself?

How do we respond to God when we feel like he has spoken to us and we are “waiting forever” to see that come to fruition?

I have a dear friend and this week she told me something I just have to share.  About a year and a half ago we were lucky enough to see each other multiple times a week since we lived a block apart and had kids around the same age. We shared a lot of life. One of her biggest longings in this time was to adopted a child.  She felt strongly this child was out there and waiting for them, but their house was not up to the spacing requirements for placing another child. It seemed like every time they tried to move forward in one way or another, another obstacle would arise and the discouragement, frustration, and sadness would settle in.

In that season of life, she took her two kids to a local library here in Pasadena to check out some books. She absolutely fell in love with a book she picked up that day that brought her to tears. It was called Someday,by Eileen Spinelli.

The book tells a story of a little girl with huge dreams and “someday” they will be a reality. But these best part about this book is the page after each big dream starts off with “Right now, I am…” and then talks about the small tasks she does as a child that can be the building blocks for that “someday” dream.  

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Oh man, how badly do adults need to read and be reminded of that “someday” and “right now” principle? My friend read that book daily while she had it checked out and she loved it so much that she ordered her own copy off a used book website.  When it came she noticed it was a “discarded” library book, but thought nothing of it. About six months later they unexpectedly packed up their entire lives and moved to Atlanta, Georgia, and the book made the first great purging. It took them some time to find a place out there, but when they finally got settled in, this “discarded” book still made it past the second mass pruning of excess.  She felt so encouraged by the message of the book almost as if it were a mini message from God to keep the faith, that she would “someday” have another little girl- but not by birth. For now, she would wait and parent the children she has. She will continue to activate and educate herself and others on foster and adoptive issues.

As in almost all moves across the country, finding friends and a strong community was not easy for my friend. I was so grateful to hear when she finally started making meaningful connections.  The people she began to meet were all hugely involved in foster care in the next county over, Gwinnett County, only about a 20-minute drive from where she was living in Georgia. She began to tell me story after story about how she kept meeting these amazing people and how she is being advised to get foster certified in Gwinnett County instead of her county of residence. With so much action toward supporting foster children, she was getting encouraged that her someday would be coming soon- and potentially through Gwinnett County, GA.

So, a year after purchasing this “discarded book,” my friend was ready to part ways with her precious treasure, or so she thought.  One day it was in her bag with a load of other books and she was at the mechanic shop when she noticed the “kid’s corner” could use some updated books. So, she dropped off her car to be fixed, slipped the pile of books in the kids area and snuck out. A few days later, when she came back to pick up the car, she was relieved that the book was still there- so she swiped it up to take it back home as a keepsake. But for the first time ever, she noticed the library that originally housed this beautiful book a year ago. On the front cover above the sticker barcode reads, “Gwinnett County Library.

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Her mouth dropped. A full year prior, she sat in her living room in Pasadena, California and ordered a “discarded” book that happened to come from a county that she had NO IDEA she would soon be moving next to.

Did her dream come true? Not yet, it is still “deferred” according to Langston Hughes, but is has not dried up, shriveled, festered, or exploded. Her dream has been renewed, restored, revived, and encouraged.  God’s attention to details, even in the waiting, has increased her hope and has soaked her dream in faith and open her eyes to see that the longer the wait the more it relies on God. She was reminded that God is up to something bigger than what she could have ever planned.  

So if you feel like you are in a place of waiting, take heart, Hebrews 1, and this recent story shows that we are not alone. Many great men and women biblically, historically, and socially have gone before us and have had hopes to change a community, nation, or world structure. They may not have seen the full fruits of their labor, but many dreams continue to grow.  This story served as my tiny reminder that we serve a BIG God with BIG plans. “He who began a good work will be faithful to complete it” (Philippians 1:6). This does not mean that we will get everything we want in life without trial or tribulation, but it does mean that God is always working on our heart. As we move toward him on the small things, we will see him at work in all areas, small and large.

Let’s stay obedient and diligent on the little things we have “right now.” Let’s be patient with ourselves and others in this process because the seemingly mundane and meaningless tasks of today can turn into the groundwork or the investments for our “Someday,” Not only personally, but nationally and globally as well.

Let’s also hold to hope to keep the dreams alive for the big giant dreams that matter to God. Things like sharing his message to all people, restoring relationship with him, healing the sick, loving the discarded and downtrodden, standing in the gap for injustice, taking care of the orphan and widow, and loving our neighbors.  There are many battles to fight, and we each have our part in the greater war. Do not lose hope, if you are a follower of Christ, take heart, “In this world, you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). We know who holds the victory in the end. So gird up for each day and be faithful with the little and the big. Let your dreams grow, swell, and be revived time and time again.